20s Lessons

While perusing Twitter I found some linkage titled "25 things I've learned in my 20s [ source ].  This was a fantastic read for me and most of these I can completely relate to.

Enjoy!

1. You can’t date a jerk and expect to turn them into a good person. Jerks are fully committed to being unpleasant. Those brief moments of tenderness they give you are  designed to trip you up and give you false hope. It’s best to stay away altogether.<br> So true.  So many of us girls are drawn to the jerks thinking we can "change" them or we'll be "the one" to them that makes them change their jerkish ways.  Nope, nada. Untrue.  Stay-the-hell-away! 
2. The rumors are true: your metabolism does slow down as you get older! That means if you’re still eating whatever you want, there’s a good chance you’ll start to gain an awkward amount of weight. It won’t be too drastic but your clothes will start to hang differently on your body and you’ll feel an overall feeling of unattractiveness. Start to be conscious of what you eat and strive to live a healthier lifestyle if you want to get your teen body back. (Let’s be real though, that might not ever come back.) <br> Again. Very true.  This shit creeps up on you and before you know it, the case of the muffin top and flabby arms ensues.  
3. You’re going to lose touch with a lot of your friends. With some people, it will be expected but with others it will feel like a punch to the stomach. No friendship is truly safe in your twenties. You’re undergoing so many personal and professional changes that there’s bound to be some casualties along the way. Don’t worry though. You’ll end up with the ones that matter. If someone’s no longer in your life, it’s for a reason. <br> This is totally sad but true.  People do tend to just follow their own courses as they grow up.  Marriages, new jobs, moves, etc.  Whatever the case is, people drift.  I have found that in situations where people have drifted, it is a friendship that is salvageable.  In the end, you do end up making solid friendships with those that matter.  During this time, as you grow up you start to realize the kind of people you want to surround yourself with... and you do.
4. You’ll be jealous of everyone who’s more successful than you. That’s okay. Just transfer that jealousy into something productive, like working really hard so you can one day eclipse them and make them feel jealous of YOU.  <br> hrmm... not so much for me, but I have seen this happen to many folks.  They try to "one up" the other person, or even pitifully try to BE the other person by allofasudden finding a new hobby that has been their life's dream.  A month later, they're on to the next hobby/life dream.
5. You’ll question every decision you make and never feel completely certain that you made the right choice. It’s pointless to wonder though. You’re here now so you might as well make it be the right decision. <br> Put simply... just follow your heart. :)
6. You’re going to give your heart to a few people who don’t deserve it. Then, one day you’ll come to your senses and ask them to give it back. <br> Done & done.  Don't settle for anything less than what you deserve.  Life is short... the 20s are short.  Live it and love it.
7. You’ll see your parents get older. You’ll come home during Christmas break and see new lines developing on their faces. One day it’ll just hit you that your parents are old and going to die. There’s nothing you can do about it, besides treat them with kindness and visit as much as your budget permits. <br> Living on the other side of the country from my parents and only getting to see them 1x a year at most, this is something I've noticed.  People do age, people do make their way through life.  I try to stay in touch with them as much as possible.
8. You’ll have a boss who makes you feel like you’re nothing. It doesn’t have to be in a Devil Wears Prada way. The cruelty can be much more subtle. Don’t let them get to you though. They have no idea who the hell you really are and you’re probably going to have their job someday so… <br>  Frustrating times but it is true.  They don't know you on a personal level and perhaps the wear and tear is to only make you succeed more in your role.  
9. Doing drugs is fun until it’s not, until it starts affecting your life in negative ways and leaves you feeling guilty and wrecked. If that happens, you should stop doing them.
10. You’re going to puke in public. It’s fine. No one cares. Just puke. <br>  Hashbrowns, in the monsoon, whilst smoking.  Puke, then move along. 
11. You’ll know how to make twenty dollars last an entire week because you spent almost all of your paycheck on groceries at Whole Foods and drunk cab rides. This lesson in frugality will serve you well. <br> Pouring water into your shampoo to get the-very-last-drop; using kleenex for TP; becoming creative with dinners (stovetop dressing with sidekicks).  
12. You’re going to betray your convictions. You’re going to feel shame. You’re going to continue to put yourself in situations that aren’t good for you. And then, slowly but surely, it will become less frequent. It might not ever go away completely but it won’t be as bad. In the meantime, stop shame spiraling about it. It gets you nowhere. <br>  This hits home for my early 20 years.  There have been some precarious situations I've put myself in, but as the years passed you start to...well...grow up.
13. Loving yourself is hard. Hating yourself is harder. <br> Never hate yourself.  Learn to love yourself.
14. You’re going to hook up with someone who you would never touch in the daylight sober. Just don’t freak out too much about it. Consider it to be your good deed for the day. <br>  I see this happen with girlfriends around me.  Hasn't happened to me, and honestly I don't feel like I've missed out on anything. :)
15. You’re going to have people in your life who are toxic. They may say that they love you, they may say that they have your back, but they don’t. Get rid of them. <br> Done.  Adios fair weathered "friend."  
16. You’ll have moments with someone that are so intense, it’ll feel like you’ve been electrocuted back to life. You’ll hold on to these moments for a long time. They’ll give you hope when you’re going through the motions. <br>  The intensity has driven me mad, and then ultimately made me the happiest 30 year old on the block.  These moments are cherished.
17. You’ll always care about your first love. That doesn’t make you crazy, it just makes you human. When relationships end, it’s not so cut and dry. You carry everyone you’ve ever loved into every relationship thereafter. <br>  I'm not heartless, and I do care.  Having said that, I wouldn't ever go back.  It was a point in my life and I've since moved on.
18. You’ll enter your twenties as a fashion disaster and (hopefully) leave them looking fantastic. If you don’t know how to put yourself together by then, I really don’t know what to tell you. <br> Hahahah this made me LOL!!! 
19. You’ll realize that the Internet can be a cruel son of a bitch but, you know, www.whatever.com.  <br>  Cruel, funny, enlightening, educational.  
20. So much of what you think matters doesn’t actually matter at all. It’s kind of rude. Like, thanks for making me believe in things that are ultimately so inconsequential, you jerk. <br>  I will always be this way, 20s or not.  My noggin goes into overdrive and starts racing.  But still... thank's a lot.. jerk.
21.  You’ll treat someone terribly. Whether it to be a lover or your friend, there’ll be someone whose feelings you take for granted. We focus too much on whether or not someone is hurting us. The reality is that we might actually be the one who’s hurting someone. <br>  This has been a HUGE reality check as of late.  Working on it.  Time to put yourself aside and look at those beside you and realize without them... you have nothing.
22. Doing “grown-up things” doesn’t make you a grown up. Shopping for housewares, buying a plant, embracing domesticity — these things don’t create maturity. If you’re still a baby who hasn’t figured things out, you’ll remain a baby, no matter how many times you pay your rent on time. <br>  So true.  Living with your parentals until your early, mid, even late twenties.... zero life experience.  And you will remain a baby because you are being babied and haven't stepped out into the real world to know what it's like to have to do things like step 11.  Will be a harsh reality check for you some day. :)
23. Don’t force yourself into loving anyone. If it’s not working in the beginning, it’s probably not going to work ever. <br>  Learned this in my teens (before knowing what Love really is), but it was a good life lesson.
24. You are so lucky to have everything that you have. Stop crying about an unreturned text message and get some perspective. <br>  Life is short.  Appreciate it.  Don't sweat the small stuff.
25. Don’t go too long without having sex. Ever.  <br> Ever, ever, ever.